Some people have taken on the mission of healing the family. I call them Guides of the Clan or Family Guides. This name is connected to the level of their energetic mission but firmly grounded in the real world. Because I don't believe in coincidence, you were not born into your family by chance. The soul always chooses the place, date, and family in which it will reincarnate anew in a body. The motivation for this choice can vary.
Always remember that your biological family is your karmic family. Each member of the family represents a significant lesson to be learned. It doesn't matter whether a parent abandoned you, you don't know them, or whether they loved you or were a psychopath. Karmic patterns from past lives will find you and resurface in the behaviors of your closest family members so that you can finally understand and free yourself from their toxins. Based on a thousand sessions with clients, I have noticed that the family presents the most crucial issues that need healing within oneself.
A mother who neglects her children teaches them self-sufficiency in life, or perhaps in their past lives, her own children didn't care for her as their parents. Karma always seeks balance.
An alcoholic father signifies that in their past lives, the children also had this problem, and now, among other lessons, they need to free themselves from any addictions completely.
A jealous sister signals the need for her sister to break free from competition with other women and the fear and manipulation associated with it. It's a way to learn not to fight for influence, money, or, later, a man.
Being born into a low-income family either attracts you to liberate yourself from the patterns of scarcity and learn to live abundantly, or it's your own chosen punishment for past deceit and theft from previous incarnations.
A family with solid religious patterns or an attachment to any doctrines, meaning closed-minded individuals, reminds them that you were once like them, so it's time to open up.
Overly controlling parents provide a perfect model for children who might have been the same in their past lives and now experience this oppression.
Spouses who betray each other are a lesson for their children not to do the same because evidently, they had similar experiences before in their past lives.
I've generalized the examples, but it's essential for me that you reflect on why you chose such a family. Instead of cursing or resenting them, understand this beautiful lesson you've selected for yourself: upbringing within a family. Only here, on this planet, does such an opportunity exist. We have animal bodies, so there's also an instinct to organize into packs and a strong bond with them. You can run away from them and disappear forever. But their family patterns will always be in your energies until you accept and release them. Consider, therefore, what toxic baggage you carry from your mother or father, and free yourself from it without blaming them. How do you know what they indeed went through?
There are no saints here on Earth. There are souls that go through various experiences. Sometimes things go well for them, sometimes not. But for high-vibrational consciousness based on Love, these are just experiences, not good or bad. Everyone has the right to them and reacts as best they can at the given time. So, stop blaming your family and focus on yourself so that by complaining about your parents, you don't become like them over time. It's worth working on clearing the family karma so it doesn't endlessly chase you and the next generations.
German psychotherapist Bert Hellinger played a crucial therapeutic role in this topic. His developed method of family constellations wisely reminded us of the influence of old family stories on our current lives. I might not be a big fan of his patriarchal dogmas sometimes, but I recommend this tool as one of the most effective for working with family karma. Regressive sessions are also practical in this case. We look at our relationships with family members differently when we feel how we once were for them. Humility is a good teacher.
Many people in the family choose to be the Family Guides if we say it in an energetic sense. These conscious souls are aware that they were born into such a family to liberate themselves from their toxic patterns similar to those exhibited by the family. They, however, opt for a conscious self-change, breaking the cycle of toxic familial patterns, thus freeing future generations from it. Sometimes, being a family guide begins from a young age when children take over their parents' responsibilities and later shoulder adult problems. It is the role of the victim within the family.The second method of action for a family guide is to be a rebellious, combative, or defiant child, often also an ailing one. Here, a different tactic comes into play. Parents' intense experiences, bordering on training or warfare, serve as a cry to the family to change. However, this stance resembles an executioner's. Many people use a mixed approach.
The most important thing for us, though, is not to get entangled in familial karmic webs, not to burn out in the mission, and to be able to set boundaries in time. It, too, is a lesson. Saying no to close family members is often more challenging than to ordinary strangers. Here, again, the herd instinct comes into play, our subconscious animal behavior of being in the family, and its significance. Have you ever wondered why rejection from parents hurts us so much, and yet we quickly accept it when a friend leaves us? See how strong our subconscious connection to family is. Many don't want to build families because they fear the responsibility and hurt. The official version, of course, is different.
My dear Family Guide, please remember that everything can be changed... within oneself because you can only inspire other people, even if they are family members. Thank you for all the family experiences because there are also good ones, and we are already creating our new life in line with our values, wiser because of what our ancestors have shown us.
That's what development is all about!
Painting Frederick George Cotman " One of the family" Yes!!!